Here
we go with the first series, You Need To Know This.
Yes, I changed the title already. I'm having trouble making
decisions lately. Oh well.
I was also having a heck of a time
deciding in what order these posts should appear. I'd read the list
and get totally stuck. Couldn't move. I'd head over to Facebook to
see if I could clear my brain. We all know how that works. Doesn't.
Then, one day, when I was working out, the answer came to me. I
love it when that happens. I stop thinking about what's bugging me
and, when I least expect it, bingo - the answer.
Here's what I figured out. I wouldn't
choose the order, I'd let somebody else choose the order! And who
would that someone else be? Some of the very people for whom these
posts matter. Other artists in my life, people I've known over the
years as students or colleagues, the very people I think about as I
am writing these posts.
The first post has been chosen by:
Adam Kemmerer. Adam studied voice with
me when I taught at Muhlenberg College in Allentown,
Pennsylvania. Being a part of Adam's development from a quiet,
almost shy young man into a “you gotta hear this guy”
singer/actor was one of the highlights (so far) of my teaching
career. He tried everything I suggested, including regular practice
sessions (what a concept) and if it didn't work, he tried again. In
the 4 years he studied with me, he never gave up. Ever. His hard
work was rewarded with many leading roles while at Muhlenberg. That
hard work continues to reward him now, as he pursues his career in
New York City. Here, check out his website:
There's one more thing I have to tell you
about Adam. He is a throwback guy, to the time when a person kept
their word, and had integrity about their work and life. I've
always admired that about him. Adam
chose:
Have A Plan
Spend Some Time With Your Dreams
Spend Some Time With Your Dreams
The first thing you need to do is spend some time with Dreams #1 and #2. Remember
when you were 10 and you'd live our your dreams in your bedroom?
Yes, that dream. Mine involved my sister's records, a hairbrush
which thought it was a microphone and a huge audience. That's Dream
#1 and it is very important. That's the one that you're probably
trying to work on every day OR the one that you spend all of your
time trying to ignore. If you're already working on this dream every
day, keep going. If you're ignoring the dream, I have a piece of
advice for you. Don't do that!!! Little kids, especially the one
that resides inside of you, are extremely honest. Pay attention.
You don't have to act yet, but you do have to pay attention. That
dream is the essence of who you were meant to be, especially if you
were also using that hairbrush as your microphone, directing the
neighborhood in dramatic productions or painting on the walls.
Dream
#2 is very close to Dream #1, but more pragmatic. Dream #2 possibly
appeared at the same time as Dream #1, but might have appeared later,
perhaps when you were in your teens. The realities of life were
becoming clearer to you. Yes, you loved playing the guitar, but you
also loved the volunteer work you did with special needs kids.
Perhaps Dream #2 led you to your present work with autistic children.
When you think about your life, you feel pretty darn good. Working with special needs kids is fulfilling for you. You've also had some amazing performing
opportunities in your life, perhaps even touring with your band all
over the US for a couple of years. While there are days when your
work with the kids wears you out, you recognize that your passion for the guitar is still alive. For all of this,you are grateful.
Dream #2 should not feel like you've settled for second-best. Dream
#2 should feel like you went with a strong passion, which is a
variation of Dream #1. Both
of these dreams should bring you great joy and a sense that you are
doing what you were meant to do with your life.
I was going to tell you to write down your Dreams, but then I realized
I have never written mine down. I don't have to. They are alive and
present in my gut and in my work. If you think it will help you,
take the time to write them down. Don't worry, this post will be
waiting for you.
Convert
Your Dreams Into A Plan
Dreaming is absolutely necessary. I
can't encourage you enough to dream. Go ahead. But we also have to
figure out how you're going to turn those dreams into reality. And
this is the point where you are either getting ready to stop reading
this post or have become immensely intrigued.
Turning dreams into reality IS terrifying. And yes, this can feel like another pointless exercise. Do it anyway.
If you find even one miniscule insight into what drives you, this
exercise will be worth the effort.
Write
The Plan Down
Honestly,
I find this to be one of the scariest exercises in life. I
do. There's something about writing goals down that makes them feel
more permanent, and that means I have to commit. Yikes. Your plan
can be as simple as a list of goals or as intricate as working with a
life coach. Here's three different approaches that I have used:
1.
Strategic Plan –
I
was in my late 20s the
first time I did a Strategic Plan. It was tough and driven. I
acted on it for a few months, got discouraged and stuck it in the
back of the filing cabinet. That was a mistake, but that's what I
did. Some
years later, I stumbled upon this Strategic Plan and was pleasantly
surprised to find I had actually achieved some of my original goals. But I couldn't use this Plan now. It was as outdated as my Olivia Newton John hairstyle.
Flash
forward to 5 years ago. While life was fulfilling in many ways,
there was this occasional nudge in my gut that said, “Hey, you up
there. Are you sure you are doing what you really want to be
doing?” I recognized that the time had come for another Plan so I could get the nudge to stop.
I
vowed to begin this Strategic Plan at the end of a
weekend getaway to San Diego. I have a very strong memory of
walking around the San Diego Airport, literally afraid to put my
hopes and dreams for my life on paper. I remember laughing at
myself as I desperately tried to find something in the airport that
needed my attention more than this exercise. Me, the strong one,
the doer, the one always giving out the advice could NOT put that
pen to that paper.
When
I did finally start writing, here are the steps I followed:
- I divided the Plan into no more than three areas. Mine were Performing, Teaching and Personal.
- I started by envisioning 5 years in the future and then I worked backwards. This was very important. Most of us know exactly where we want to be, but we can't see how to get there from where we are right now.
- I chose 3-5 goals under each area for each of the 5 years.
- I wrote it down.
- I was prepared to spend time with the Plan. I knew I would have to draft, contemplate and edit.
- I set a deadline. The possibility exists that you will get frustrated and want to give up. A deadline will help you finish the Plan.
2.
Another Way – Okay,
does that idea feel too restrained for you? Perhaps you are
hyperventilating at the thought of such a clear exercise? Try this
approach instead:
- Pick a date in the future, let's say Thursday, April 15, 2017. Yes, five years out seems to be the magic number.
- Write what that day is like in your life. Where do you live? Who do you live with? What do your clothes look like? What time do you get up? Where do you go? How do you feel? What do you eat for lunch? Where have you been?
- You can make lists, you can write a story, you can draw pictures. Doesn't matter how, just get the vision out of your head and onto paper.
I
did this exercise spontaneously one night sitting on the train, over one year after I had finished my Plan. I
was astonished to find that the intersection of my personal well-being, my career and my relationships dominated my writing. I was also delightfully surprised to find that: a) my
life wasn't that far off from what I was writing and, b) the life I
wrote about felt extremely possible. You know what I think
happened? I think I wasn't even aware of how much had been set in
motion by that next Plan.
3.Best
Year Yet – I mentioned before
in the Accomplishments post my work with Best Year Yet. This is yet another system of looking at where you are in
your life and where you want to be. It isn't perfect, but right
now, Best Year Yet is definitely helping me to stay
on track. I have teamed up with a friend to do my Best Year Yet
work. We send the master report at the beginning of the year and
then send monthly reports to each other.
Now
What?
Congratulations.
Your Plan, in whatever form, is done. While creating The Plan took
more time than you expected, you feel good because now you have a
clearer vision of what you want out of life. You've planted seeds in
your brain and in your guts. Excellent.
Put
it away. Reward yourself for a job well done. You'll know when the
time has come for you to reflect on your Plan again. Yes, you will. There's only one more step for you to take.
Enlist
A Buddy
Remember the mistake I mentioned way back
at Strategic Plan? Getting discouraged and sticking the plan
in the file cabinet? Yeah, well, you can thank me later for making
that mistake so you don't have to.
I strongly encourage you to find a person
in your life whom you trust with all of your dreams, desires and junk
to keep you true to your Plan. Look for someone in your life who you
think might be interested in working on a Plan for their life. Going
through the process with someone else, having to articulate your
vision to another person is exactly what you need to bring your
dreams to reality. In fact, I'm willing to try to help. If you're
looking for someone, comment on this post and I'll try to match you
with a Buddy.
Enlisting a Buddy has changed my life.
Dreams and goals that flitted by before, like this blog, are now
being acted upon. The work is not always easy. My Buddy has the
ability to ask me the difficult questions. She also knows
when to let me slide. My Buddy gives me permission to let those old goals that no longer fit my life disappear. And don't tell me there's no time.
Once you get the Plan written, the time commitment is minimal. Both
my Buddy and I have extremely full lives, sometimes bursting at the
seams, but that forces us to be efficient. Because we live far apart
from each other, we rely on Google Docs, email and the rare phone
call. If we can find the time to work on our Plans, so can YOU.
Whew! I know that you now have quite a bit to consider, to ponder, to contemplate. To assist you, here's a quick summary:
Spend some time with your Dreams
Convert your Dreams into a Plan
Write your Plan down
Enlist a Buddy
I'm looking forward to your comments.
Wow. This is HUGE...and well thought out, Heidi! I especially like the section on dreams. I hope all the other artists out there follow your good advice!
ReplyDeleteYes, Jean, you are correct. This is huge. Here's to boldness and courage for everyone reading this series.
ReplyDelete