Tuesday, August 30, 2016

The Waiting Game

I'm currently in the middle of an extreme round of the waiting game.

I've been playing this version of the waiting game for ten weeks.  Which, of course, feels like an eternity.  Many days, particularly during the last three weeks, I say to myself, "today will be the day I get the call."  Some days I do get a call, but instead of a definite answer, they are a request for another presentation of another skill.

It's possible the start date of this project is now one week away.  Did I mention that this project involves being away from my home base for many months?

It's a challenge.

Here's how I am managing:

1) Keep living.  Like I said in this post a few years ago, carry on.  Do the work of the day, like writing this post!  You know what really works for me?  You are going to be so surprised.  Creating.  I've already written two songs.  Practicing music takes me away.  As does exercising. I run to both these days.

2) It's not about me.  Decisions as big as this one are giant puzzles with many pieces.  I recognize I am merely one piece of that decision.  I've done the work that is my responsibility. I've prepared for meetings as requested and given my presentations.  I need to give the decision-makers time to make the best decisions.

3) They aren't doing this to be mean to me.  This is an ancient response in my gut, fed by years of "you don't deserve this", "other people get to live the life of their dreams, not us" and my personal favorite "if you were really talented, they would snap you up right away".

4) Put work associates on alert.  Since mine are in the same industry, they understand the situation.  They are willing to wait with me.  Beyond that, I've confided in a few trusted souls.  I haven't posted to social media at all. There's no reason.  That will only bring more angsty energy.  I don't need that right now.

5) Remember that this is a fantastic experience.  I am meeting new contacts in my business at a higher level.  I am learning new skills.  If that is all that comes out of this, I'm fine with that.

6) Look at all of the marvelous lessons I am practicing.  Living in the moment.  Taking care of what I can take care of. Even if I don't get this project, practicing these lessons again is of great value.

Wow.  I'm glad I wrote this all down.  I knew this has been a positive experience, but I didn't realize it was this positive.

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